Just fell off a train. Bad.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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