i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
