She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
