she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
