It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
he just fucked me for my cheese.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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