If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
