Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
