I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
