No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
