Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
you didnt know i had herpes?
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
