did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
