goodnight i made you a song goodbye
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize
