I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize