ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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