sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize