u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
there is puke in my bra ... again
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize
