well you can't waste a boner
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
