fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize