i just wanna soil my oats bro
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Randomize
