Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize
