Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
