So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I FOUND THE LEGS
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
