she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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