Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
