ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
