We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize