"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
