No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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