if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
