Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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