she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Randomize
