problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Randomize
