So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
