is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
