i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
If I die, sorry about rent.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
