okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
