so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
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