why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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