So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
found the other keg... it's in the tree
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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