Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry pj88 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(970): View more from Colorado

You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.

Fav 3 3194 937
share tweet
(407): View more from Florida

Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober

Fav 19 1086 2867
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(847): View more from Illinois

he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since

Fav 13 1361 3866
share tweet
(904): View more from Florida

How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.

Fav 17 889 3267
share tweet
(814): View more from Pennsylvania

MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.

Fav 36 6062 1281
share tweet
(219): View more from Indiana

She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.

Fav 21 4517 1721
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(716): View more from New York

ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.

Fav 7 1765 2972
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(585): View more from New York

She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.

Fav 5 459 895
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(780): View more from Alberta, CA

I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.

(867): View more from Yukon/N.W.Territory

I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise

Fav 0 91 7
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT