We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
