I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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