Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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