it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
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