Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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