Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
