oh god the rape fog is back!
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
