just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
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