Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
