they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize
