worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
