i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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